Last Tuesday I thought it'll be cool to teeter around in one of the dresses (actually correction, it's the only one I've ever purchased by far) I bought from H&M. It was three sizes too huge, hence adding on emphasis to the conjectured term 'oversized' in the whole ideology of 'dresses are oversized t-shirts' (coined by me) because I speculate that dresses are simply and merely baggy, oversized t-shirts because 1) one is to lazy to wear pants or 2) one couldn't even bother to put on shorts either. Great invention!
Kudos to the creator of dresses. And sorry for that long blabber of nonsensical verbal diarrhoea.
Here's the real question: Why do we even wear dresses? Is it because girls desire to look more feminine - radiating that inner damsel self - when it comes to a dinner date with their Mr Big so that it sexually and sartorially appeal to the opposite gender? Or is it because dresses (think gowns) are deemed as a better option to appear on red carpet because it channels class and composure? Or is it simply because, as aforementioned, one is simply too lazy to put on some pants? Then why put on safety shorts instead? Why not go commando?
So why waste money on buying pants if we can cover and conceal our breasts and butts with one piece on clothing instead of two? And isn't it sartorially more demeanour and pleasant for the opposite sex to eventually sexually indulge and further desire us? That's killing two birds with one stone! But are we all going on a financial compensation and being Samantha Jones?
Try to foresight this: After two years, you eventually got more successful - and hence, richer - and our Mr Big becomes our Mr no-Big-deal-if-you-repelled (it would've been best if you repelled other men's attention), does that mean that all our dresses will seek out to Salvation Army? Does it mean you have to sacrifice your favourite boxy breton striped dress you painstaking acquired it three years ago from Zara (that was the dress that got away, it didn't exist in Singapore, boohoo!) just because your phased out of wearing dresses? What if you and your dress are inseparable? I know that in my case, as dresses emanate a more effeminate feel - which oppose to my man repelling ways and my notion of 'Dressing up for myself and not for the comfort of others' - and that my clothes and I are usually inherently integral, I thought: "Why save money (and then waste money) and attract boys when I can further repel myself?" After some critical suggestion and shorts (or pants), here's what I propose.
Wear the dress once. Then twice. Then thrice. If you've out won yourself in cogitating ways to work a dress as a dress itself every time, then congratulations! Carry on for multiple times. Once you've outworn and worn out your brain cells, you then carry on to put some jeans on (or shorts, if you feel like doing so). Slip on your favourite shoes (In my case, it's none other than my Superga) and carry your favourite minaudière for confidence. Remember to accessorise as well.
Tada! Don't you feel victorious? Do you really need to toss that dress into charitable organisations? How do you feel about yourself now? Any sense of accomplishment? Oh, psst, you can also get inspired from the above images of Leandra herself.
H&M Spring 2014 tassel denim dress, Zara jeans which I had to snatch it away from a b*tch (lol, jk, I waited for her to discard it after she tested them on), Man Repeller x Superga satin sneakers, Zara clutch.
Image credits Imran