'Why are flamingoes pink?'
I spoke too loudly. My surroundings looked at me in bewilderment, some dumbfounded with their mouth sunk so deep that you could see a ravine being eradicated. Everyone thought I was a ridicule.
I clasps my hands over my mouth in shame, cheeks flushed in bright ruby woo (not in those 'Omg I saw my crush' ruby woo, but the 'Shit I sharted in my pants and I'm embarrassed' ruby woo) and my eyes darted to see if people were still staring in my direction. I've spoken the unanticipated, the humorous yet humiliating mockery of all time, all too vociferously. People jeered at me and some even whispered the word 'stupid'. Truth is, I wasn't ridiculous. Don't anyone actually hanker over the aforementioned question? Why aren't any of us curious about how things or objects or cases scenarios are what they are and not indifferent? Why are flamingoes pink and not blue? Why aren't flamingoes wearing shoes? Why isn't the sky green and sands pink? Why aren't floral scents pungent? Why don't I smell good?
Lol, jk, I smell marvelous.
But that's just the veracity. I mean the part whereby we seldom question, but I do, indeed smell marvelous (enhanced with Dolce & Gabbana's Light Blue, pssst it's a secret). We often conclude things as so it is and never get bothered by it (exception for those over-thinkers). We never debate over the white t-shirt, because no matter how we argue, it is an inherent reality that the white t-shirt will be an indispensable part in our fashun lives. But why is it that, unlike the white t-shirt and pink flamingoes, printed t-shirts and flamingoes in yellow booties are highly controversial?
I walked over, inspected at that cotton candy pink creature, and glanced down to my basic white t-shirt. In retrospect, my white t-shirt was being thrown into an interrogation earlier this morning. I wasn't even aware that such a succinct and simple garment I've predicted not be implicated into a debatable topic would eventually be confronted. And it actually happened on me.
'Where are those stains from?'
Flustered with shock and awkwardness (I had curry for lunch), I took a quick peek at my tee.
'What stains?'
There were no visible sighting of any bisque turmeric stain. And even if there was, it was close to atomic size.
'That big ass print is the stain to your white tee'
'What?'
My friend didn't approve my printed tee. It has 'New York' plastered across my chest in an Apple with a suspending monkey (or ape? or Godzilla?). Don't everyone love anything New York City related? Why is she so against my white (printed) t-shirt? It wasn't anything insulting, that's for sure (unless you find that hairy monkey/gorilla/creature repulsive). Then why was she so against my t-shirt?
I picked up the flamingo tee, as a form of irritating her (albeit I authentically loved it), headed straight to the cashier and slashed twenty five bucks off my savings account. Who needs a basic t-shirt (wait, I take that back. We all need a basic t-shirt in every colour) when we can have a printed one? Who says a basic t-shirt acts as a sartorial impediment towards the use of printed ones? I've decided to annoy my friend once more.
'Flamingoes are so Wednesdays because on Wednesdays we wear pink.' I said in a bimbo's tonality.
(Motif tees from Uniqlo USA Omiyage UT collaboration)